"Your gifts will make room for you..."

This is an interpretation of a Bible verse*, and my mom quotes it to me periodically to remind me that God gives each of us specific talents and when we use those talents, we find fulfillment.  Not necessarily monetary riches, not necessarily fame, but the fulfillment that comes from knowing that you have everything that you need in order to do what you need to do.

I found myself so disturbed by repeatedly receiving news of shootings of innocent black people by police officers that I HAD to find an outlet for the poison that threatened to overtake me.  That outlet, for me, has always been writing.  When I don't want to deal with something, I don't write at all.  This can go on for months, and even years... until I feel spiritually toxic and I know that it's time to stop avoiding and purge.  Ground zero is always "put some words on a page."

So, feeling like I was on a steady diet of death, hatred, & destruction, I ran back to the written word.  I started journaling again, I wrote a couple of blog posts here, and I also decided to share some of my observations and commentary with others on Instagram in the form of a daily haiku.  Whatever is going on in a particular day, whatever thoughts are true for me at the moment that I sit down to write - I write a haiku about it.  Inspired by the #100DayProject, I will be doing this for (at least) 100 days.  So far, I'm up to day 30, and it feels like I just started yesterday.  The act of writing has been a nice

*pause*

to my day.  For someone who has trouble slowing down enough to meditate consistently, this is a "writing meditation" of sorts.  I'm writing, not only to share my thoughts, but also in hopes that what I have to share will resonate with whomever needs to read it.

Over the last 30 days, I've become more aware of the poetry community on Instagram.  Before this, I didn't even know there was such a thing!  One of the poet's accounts that I now follow announced a poetry contest, and, on a whim - I wrote a poem and entered.

Guess who won?  (I did!)

I believe that God/ The Universe (b/c I see them as one and the same) will give us clues when we are moving in the right direction.  Sometimes it's in the form of someone saying "I really needed to read that poem today."  Sometimes it's in the form of someone running an online poetry contest, you saying "Sure, why not?" and your winning as an "I see you." moment.

Anyway, I'm writing. Again.  Just as I have been since elementary school.

The more things change, the more things stay the same.


--Nicole

*Proverbs 18:16